Tuesday, May 31, 2016

Video tutorials for massage and oral techniques

One of the most common requests I get is for video tutorials, and I've been accumulating notes for a couple of years about videos that will help newcomers.  It has gone slowly because I don't really have time to scan a lot of videos and because there is so much bad stuff out there, which I find a turn-off.

However, a new amateur video by a couple of friends has inspired me to put something together for you.  One problem is that many of the videos are only reliably found on pay-sites, even though they are also frequently available on free porn-sites.  So rather than provide you with links that are highly perishable or lead only to a paywall, I will instead give a title and length for each one and leave it up to you to search for them.

However, two pay-sites are worth special mention:


Hegre-Art has a large collection of massage videos and a small collection of videos that are specifically about tantric sex.  As is often the case with online materials, the tantra videos try to hit a balance between a quasi-spiritual approach to tantric sex and a purely secular one.  You may find the music a bit hokey or irritating, but fortunately there is no narration.

The other videos range from relatively mild, but explicit, massage videos to frankly pornographic ones.  The massage techniques also vary a lot in type and quality, including some that are so bad they are more useful as a guide to what NOT to do.

The biggest advantages to the Hegre videos are their length and the quality of the photography.  They are usually at least 25 minutes to an hour, compared with many free porn videos that are 5-15 minutes.  And the lighting and photography are always first-rate.

The biggest disadvantages are the erratic techniques and the preference for men with freakishly large penises.  Many of the massage givers in the earlier videos were locally hired at resort hotels around the world, and the genital massage techniques, in particular, can be primitive.  And no technique demonstrated on a 9" penis is going to be easy to transfer to a normal 4-6" penis.

The women also tend to be quite flexible and model-thin, with skinny legs and bony hips. This actually helps you see the techniques better by allowing the camera access for closeups of what is going on.  However, it also creates an unrealistic impression of yoni massage techniques because of how much open "workspace" there is between their legs.

Just keep in mind as you watch them that you won't have as much room to maneuver and to see what you're doing with a curvier woman with normal legs, butt, and belly, and more padding in the vulva area.

Finally, until around 2016 the Hegre-Arts tantra videos and massage videos did not include any oral, which is quite unrealistic. As you watch the earlier videos, look for places where mixing in some licks, nibbles, mouth caresses, and judicious suction would have provided variety and improved the experience.

The subscription price is $30-40/month or $150/year.  Alternatively, the Hegre massage videos are often available on sites like PornHub and Xhamster if you look for them.

The New School of Erotic Touch/Orgasmic Yoga Institute

These two organizations share a structure and a home.  Subscribing to either one gets you access to both sites for $39/month or $99/3 months + $10/month thereafter.  You can download as much as you want, so you can theoretically sign up for just one month and download all their videos.

Between the two sites, there are hundreds of video tutorials related to tantric sex, massage, and just about every sexual topic you can think of.  Most (all?) include narration. In general, the photographic quality is much less professional than with Hegre.

Narration quality varies quite a lot as well.  Some of it is pretty bad, and some of the topics are New Age junk, but the good ones I saw had excellent tips for massage, oral, fingering, masturbation, and other topics. 

If you want to subscribe to The New School, this link will kick back a few dollars that I can apply to reviewing videos from the site.  If you prefer not to do that, you can go directly to http://www.eroticmassage.com. (The cost to you is the same either way.)

Videos you may be able to find on the web

Tantric Massage (narrated in English)
Source: ErosExotica.com
Time: 59:58; MF
Slim, pretty Indian girl and an attractive white man; this may be a cut down version of a longer video.  It includes massage in a pool and on a mat, yoni massage, some lingam massage, yab-yum, and maithuna. The hokey narration repeats a number of common errors on the history of tantra, what it means, etc.  You can mostly ignore it.

Tantric Massage (narrated in German)
Source unknown and there's no title screen, so the title may vary
Time: 84:27; MF/FM
This has two couples giving two separate massages, a yoni massage with first couple and a lingam massage with second. It's a good basic intro even if you don't speak German.

For partners of women:

How to Eat Pussy Like a Champ, with Nina Hartley
Source: seductionreview.com (?)
Time: 22:36; FF
A classic, available in multiple lengths and packages.  In spite of the title, there's an excellent handjob tutorial from 3:30. The oral part begins at 13:30.

Countless Orgasms (Clover on white GYN chair)
Source:  Hegre-Art
Time: 53:07; FF - labial outie
Good 2-hand labia/vulva/vaginal/anal massage ~8-16m; anal oil injector ~11m; flip@29m; several combo orgasms; good breast detail ~30-31; more good gradual vulva/clit intro ~33m; extended 2-handed clit/g-spot /anal stim and O's.

Girl Girl Massage with Engelie & Kiki
Source: Hegre-Art.com
Time: 37:15; FF - slight labial outie
Full-body sensual massage; 12m on back, bolster under hips; good slow prelim labia work; 5m kneeling position; good slow massage; excellent vulva massage closeups; several times she uses one hand on vulva, the other massaging back of neck, an interesting combo.  The video stops in the middle & cuts to shower scene >34m. Very good example of non-orgasm-focused sensual and yoni massage.  Possibly continued elsewhere, but I didn't find a Part 2.

Explosive Orgasmic Massage (Basia Massages Dominika)
Source: Hegre-Art.com
Time: 15:51; FF – major labial outie
Subject has very long, thick labia minora (makes me jealous!); there's some poor technique, including a lot of straight fingerfucking that I don't recommend, but it is notable for the closeups of working with large labial lips.

For partners of men:

Mind-Blowing Boner Massage
Source: Hegre-Art.com
Time: 35:25; FM, porndick
Probably the best complete lingam massage video; good body massage; facedown: good hand technique w/ rear-facing penis; kneeling position @9:15 w/ excellent massage of perineum, penile root, penis and balls; flipover @15min; again, excellent technique throughout, but she stopped the massage too soon when he came.

Cybele Handjob - Slow Massage and Twice Cum
Source: Handjob Paradise
Time: 28:27; FM
A classic handjob video; excellent technique with both hands, a lot of variety, and a strong finish that produces an aftershock (a 2nd orgasm) about 90 seconds after the first.  Watch it at least twice and keep an eye on her left hand the second time.

Hand Job Techniques - Prequel 1
Time: 9:04; FM
Source: VoyeurOfBliss*
Excellent minimalist lingam technique; there's a directory here, giving a nickname and time tick for each technique. Amateur video with some choppiness, but very good lighting and photography and attractive subjects.

(*There's now a collection of these videos on Pornhub.  You can check out the whole series here.)

The Art of Penis Pleasuring
Source: Hegre-Art.com
Time: 29:16; FM, ~8-9" uncut penis
Good ball work & slow, playful finger work; quite a few unusual techniques; slapping - too much? - seemed to make the penis get softer; on the other hand, it provides some good examples of ways to work with a somewhat rubbery penis.  The video has a second ending edited in (not a true aftershock).


Finally, a word of caution:  As you search for videos online keep in mind that "tantric sex" can mean something very different out in the gurusphere.  Slow, sensual sex can look boring to an outside viewer, so it's hard to commercialize what real tantric couples do.  As a result, there's a tendency to market hokey spirituality instead. Just because it has the word "tantra" on it doesn't necessarily mean it's going to be helpful to you.


  1. When I was watching videos mentioned above (a new amateur video by a couple of friends), I wondered if that the average size of penis? or perhaps above average or below?
    Although the question is besides the point but I am looking forward seeing your response.
    thank you in advance!

    1. Well, I didn't want to speculate about a friend, but... :)

      The average man's penis is 5.17" long and 4.6" in circumference when fully erect. This is from the best clinical data available, based on actual measurements of over 15,000 men using the so-called "bone-pressed" erect length, or BPEL, measurement.

      (For details, see "How Much Does Penis Size Matter?" at http://moderntantra.blogspot.com/p/penis-size.html .)

      The average woman's hand is about 2.9" (7.39cm) wide across the top of the palm, and it looks like the woman in this video couldn't quite cover the length of her guy's penis with both hands, suggesting a "BPEL" that might be around 5.9" to 6.3", or 15-16cm.

      If so, that would put his length about an inch above average, which would be in the 85th-95th percentile range, but well below the 99.9th percentile that is common in porn. Of course, it's also possible that his wife just has small hands!

      Just in aesthetic terms, I thought it was the most attractive penis in any of the videos I reviewed. And there's also an eagerness and responsiveness about it that seems natural and appealing.

      Far too many porn videos show guys who seem so bored and unresponsive that they almost look like they've been anesthetized. This can lead to an extremely heavy-handed approach that is inappropriate for most normal men. This video shows that a much lighter, more playful touch can be highly effective.

    2. Just to add some confirmation:

      The owner of the penis in that video says that "I'm about 6" in bone-pressed length." So it looks like my initial guess based on hand size was pretty close.

    3. VOB here, thank you both for posting and the compliments. It's 6" in length and 5.8" circumference.

      If I'm not intruding, I'll also link the playlist of videos by my wife and I: http://www.pornhub.com/playlist/40851922

  2. is it a isuue if u have a fore skin on penis

    1. That's how they all come, so no...

    2. Not normally.

      If the foreskin is so tight that it can't slide back and leave the head of the penis bare when you have an erection, you may need treatment for phimosis. (This usually means using a cream and doing stretching exercises to gradually expand the foreskin.)